Tuesday, November 23, 2004

Growth is Better than Comfort

Granted, over the years I have learned many lessons from God. (and by the way, they are almost always through experience rather than head knowledge.) This is not the first, or most profound, but it is one of the most recent.

It is interesting that we learn lessons better in situations we might not care for too much. So, why do we sometimes look at these situations as places we want to leave, escape from, run from?

I don't think the church was meant to be a place of comfort. It is supposed to be a furnace of healing and learning. Your place of comfort is supposed to be in your heavenly father's lap. That is a personal thing (and it can be a group thing too.. But it is a personal intimate thing between you and God). Church is supposed to be a rough and sometimes uncomfortable place where God grows you up fast because you have to actually deal with REAL PEOPLE and REAL ISSUES.

Does that happen "In church" for you?

My family has been gathering with a group of believers for the past three months or so. A very informal, house style gathering. That part I like. I like the open and non-programmed environment. But because most of the others in the group don't have the same background that I have, there are a lot of things said and done that I wince at. There are differences of opinion. There are differences of understanding. There are doctrinal differences in some cases. There are maturity level differences. (and trust me, my wife and I have discussed these things and wondered if we should leave or if this is a place God wants us to stay.)

But one thing has come out of this. People are open to discuss and confront and state their views. I have confronted people (as gently as possible) when I felt they were just plain wrong about something. It is never comfortable to do that (especially as a relative newcomer). However, it is profitable. I know what issues God is working in me now... and what He is working in others around me.

When I sat in a church "audience" and knew people only at a surface level it was not like this. When most of the people around me grew up with a similar church experience, there was little conflict (except about silly things like methods of ministry and trivial things of that sort). There was no challenging on issues deeper than ministry philosophies and things that didn't really amount to much.

In the past year I have spent time in the Book of Hebrews. Studying it with others... and by some "coincidence" it keeps coming back into my life. One of the things the Lord has re-emphasized to me this year is the truths found in Hebrews 10:24: "... let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds."

I have learned that this verse sounds so "nice"... It sounds like such an ideal... but walking it out can be stressful, painful, and anxiety ridden at times!

It means summoning the courage to "risk" a relationship, to confront someone on something you see in their life, or urge them to step up to something they are gifted in but have been afraid to do. Or sometimes worse... Being on the receiving end and trying not to take what they say as an attack but rather the loving concern of a friend.

I try to keep Proverbs 27: 6 in mind at all times...
"Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses."

There have been times in our small loose knit, un-organized, open gatherings, when I have thought half the people in the group were wrong or going off the deep end. But it is in this environment, and in a gathering of people who are at least willing to speak their mind, listen to you speak yours... and seek God's best in it all... there the Lord has me growing.

This past Sunday was really trying for me because not only did we as a group study that passage in Hebrews again, but God made me live it out too. I had to confront someone about their beliefs and their point of view. I didn't want to do it. Yet, I know that I didn't want to "trade truth for false unity" (as a verse in one of the songs we listened to that day stated it). I knew I had to discuss a subject that I felt I could not let slide. I had to trust that it was better to resolve this issue of understanding with my brother than to put on a false mask of Christian happiness and tolerance... keeping that false unity going...

And you know, I found out some things about my brother who had the differing opinion. I found out his hurts and his experiences. I learned a thing or two more about God because I had to make sure what I was saying was lining up with God's Word. Well... we didn't totally resolve our views... but I think we both grew and know, and trust each other better for it. I would never have understood my brother like that if I had chosen to zip my lip and avoid confrontation.

That does not happen in pew sitting land very often.

As difficult as it can be, it is much more refreshing to live in this land where things can be unpredictable. It is because I know I can trust others there to take what is said and be honest with me. It is preferable to me more than in the wandering wasteland of comfort I left behind.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I aggree with you. Although I am always looking for comfort it's in the tough places that I grow and change. I have been having a real pity party today and kicking and screaming about the place I find myself but I know that in the midst of this Jesus will speak to me which of course is what I long for.Man shall not live by bread alone but by every word which proceeds from the mouth of God.